Thank you for sharing this. I experience this same kind of sudden swerve into exhaustion and numbness despite having less on my plate. I don't think this is a "wrong" use of dissociation, based on what I've learned in trauma therapy. I think dissociation comes in degrees. Even if you're only partly removed from your body/the moment/your surroundings it's a real thing that's hard to deal with, and if you aren't able to pull the emergency brake then it can continue to spiral into the full depersonalization/derealization mode. (For me that's the difference between scrolling twitter to numb and being so out of it I'd rather stare at the wall for hours than even read tweets.) I am sending good energy and hoping you can get some real rest soon. <3
I feel this SO hard. I recall the worst of it starting up in about 2018 or so-had the worst of the peri-menopause (brain fog like whoa) and then an early bout of breast cancer. Then of course the stresses of the Tmp years and Covid. 2020 was disassociation central. I feel like I nearly lost the ability to write long form back then, and I'm still trying to build back my writing presence. I think some of mine was hormonally related plus working full time plus the stress of all of it. YMMV. I wish you support, Joanna. XOXO
I agree with everything except your tagline. This *is* an inspirational story. You give voice to the parents and caregivers and humans everywhere who sometimes need a break, even if they don't want to acknowledge it. Even if the guilt in taking the break overwhelms the desire to rest or disassociate. Even if they beat themselves up in the moment or in retrospect because they can't be everything to everyone, all the time. By sharing your story you allow other people to feel seen and heard and understood. It is absolutely an inspirational story.
This is so real. It doesn't matter what you call it, those times are real and need to be acknowledged. I wish I'd known the word "dissociation" when I was raising a toddler.
Thank you for sharing this. I experience this same kind of sudden swerve into exhaustion and numbness despite having less on my plate. I don't think this is a "wrong" use of dissociation, based on what I've learned in trauma therapy. I think dissociation comes in degrees. Even if you're only partly removed from your body/the moment/your surroundings it's a real thing that's hard to deal with, and if you aren't able to pull the emergency brake then it can continue to spiral into the full depersonalization/derealization mode. (For me that's the difference between scrolling twitter to numb and being so out of it I'd rather stare at the wall for hours than even read tweets.) I am sending good energy and hoping you can get some real rest soon. <3
I feel this SO hard. I recall the worst of it starting up in about 2018 or so-had the worst of the peri-menopause (brain fog like whoa) and then an early bout of breast cancer. Then of course the stresses of the Tmp years and Covid. 2020 was disassociation central. I feel like I nearly lost the ability to write long form back then, and I'm still trying to build back my writing presence. I think some of mine was hormonally related plus working full time plus the stress of all of it. YMMV. I wish you support, Joanna. XOXO
I agree with everything except your tagline. This *is* an inspirational story. You give voice to the parents and caregivers and humans everywhere who sometimes need a break, even if they don't want to acknowledge it. Even if the guilt in taking the break overwhelms the desire to rest or disassociate. Even if they beat themselves up in the moment or in retrospect because they can't be everything to everyone, all the time. By sharing your story you allow other people to feel seen and heard and understood. It is absolutely an inspirational story.
This is so real. It doesn't matter what you call it, those times are real and need to be acknowledged. I wish I'd known the word "dissociation" when I was raising a toddler.